Grief
Grief is a part of every life, and how we handle loss has a huge impact on the richness of our family's emotional life. Our comfort level with loss also gives our children an important role model. The kids who successfully live through loss are the ones who find ways to feel connected to the person they've lost AND to go on with their lives.
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Helping Kids with Grief, Loss and Bereavement
"Those who can't weep with their whole heart don't know how to laugh either."Read More
Explaining Death to Children
Dr. Markham,
Thank you for your website. It really describes the parent I strive to be. My question is about death and explaining it to a toddler. I didn't see too much about this topic so far.
My daughter is 26 months. My father is dying of cancer and she is very close with him. I think the reason for that is while he was diagnosed a year ago during the hospital stay, they bonded instantly in a way that can't be described. It is like they needed each other during that tough time. She talks about him constantly. We live far away, but they stay in touch with web cameras. She talks about him more than anyone besides her parents.
I'm very concerned about what to do for the viewing and funeral when my dad does pass away. I think it will be traumatic for her. What should I do and how do I explain it to her? I want to make it easy for her, but I'm not sure how to explain it or explain why everyone is crying. I think she will be very concerned to see me cry.
Thank you, Lisa
Books to Help You Explain Death To Children
Death is one of the great mysteries of life. Each of us will lose loved ones throughout our lives, and each of us will die. Yet few of us talk about death. And most of us find ourselves at a loss when we're faced with explaining death to our children, especially at a time when we're grieving ourselves.
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Healing after Miscarriage
My fiancé and I found out that we were just under 5 weeks pregnant just over a month ago. It was unexpected, and unplanned, but we accepted it and wanted it. Both his parents and my parents do not have grand children yet, so therefore they were more than excited to hear the news.
Just over a week later, we had a miscarriage. I had to tell so many people that we lost our baby, along with that loss I have lost my faith and I want to blame someone, I cannot seem to be ok. I show everyone around me that I am coping really well with it, yet inside I do not want to try again because I cannot stand the pain.
Everyone keeps telling me that everything happens for a reason, and then I blame myself thinking that I was the reason it did happen. I ask myself if I had wanted him more, if we would still be pregnant? I keep asking myself what I could have done? I want the hurt to stop, I want everyone to stop telling me it happened for a reason.
When will I be able to come to terms that we are no longer expecting our bundle of joy?
"I read your Toddler tips yesterday and tried each suggestion, and LO! My daughter has not been fighting me! Like some kind of magic it just works!"
Karina
Dr. Laura is a parent whisperer! - Liz McIntosh
Liz McIntosh
Dr. Laura's parenting advice completely changed my relationship with my daughter, improved her self-esteem, and transformed our lives. Providing my daughter with acknowledgement of her feelings and point of view reduced her oppositional behaviors and emotional meltdowns to nearly none. - Jodie Tokatlian
Dr. Laura, you have created miracles, large and small, in so many lives and our children thank you.
Folks, she's brilliant. It's wonderful to have parenting experts who don't see the child as the enemy in a locked combat, for one thing. I recommend it.
"I'd really recommend Laura Markham's Aha! parenting books and website for brilliantly practical ways to parent with kindness instead of punishment." - Makchoon
Makchoon
I have seen amazing improvement in my *very* angry 17 year-old son after acknowledging that there was a reason he was so angry and acting out. We have had several heartfelt conversations and I have seen a real change in how he treats his younger brother, and how he treats me.
I know that I am a better parent thanks to Dr. Laura's inspirational words and suggestions.
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Chantal Harrison
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Andrei
My daughter reacts so much better when I empathize and stay patient. And now I get to model that behavior instead of letting my frustration get the better of me.
Thank YOU so much for your encouraging weekly newsletters and your Facebook posts. Since I began following your approach, I have noticed a difference in the compassion I show to myself, and how much more that helps me connect with my kids. We are all feeling a lot more overall peace!
Thank you for your weekly emails and your books. They're a life line for me when I really need support during a rough patch. - Lisa Fernandez
Lisa Fernandez
Today I say thank you, tears streaming from my face, so proud of my little boy and all he will become. Thank you. - Jennifer B.
Jennifer B
Yes. It works. And the more rest I get, the more patience I have. It makes a difference.
Dear Dr. Laura Markham! I am a mother of 2 boys - 16 and 7 years old. I am extremely grateful for all the emotional and relational education that you provide us and also for your incredible loving energy to support our evolution as parents, as human beings. I took your course 3 years ago. Although the challenges of the parent-child relationship change almost every year, your parenting principles are equally valuable and effective. It's hard to reprogram the emotional-behavioral pattern learned in my own childhood... so I find it very helpful to go back to your teachings to regain trust and patience as a parent every time new challenges trigger my anxiety. To have more clarity, to reset my energy. Thank you!!
Janina-Madalina Dobrescu
Your philosophies are the only tools we've come across which offer practical advice grounded in clearly laid out lay terminology. Our family life day-to-day is nothing short of a miracle, thanks to you! - Dana Questad
Dana Questad
